Posted on May 24, 2023

"Joy does not simply happen to us. We have to choose joy and keep choosing it every day." - Henri J.M. Nouwen

Welcome, dear reader, to a journey of self-discovery and transformation. 

Let’s explore the art of cultivating joy. Together, we will delve into the transformative power of joy and learn actionable steps to invite more of it into our lives. So, take a deep breath, open your heart, and let us embark on this beautiful path together.

The Transformative Power of Joy

Joy, like a radiant sun, has the power to illuminate every corner of our existence. It nurtures our emotional well-being, infusing our lives with a sense of wonder, love, and gratitude. When we allow joy to flow freely, it becomes a catalyst for personal growth, resilience, and inner strength. It connects us with our authentic selves, igniting a flame of self-acceptance and self-compassion.

Understanding Your Internal Experience

To cultivate joy, you must first explore your personal internal experience. In my work as a hypnotherapist and transformative coach, I utilize components of the Internal Family Systems (IFS) philosophy. According to IFS, our minds consist of multiple parts, each part with its own beliefs, emotions, and motivations. 

All parts have good intentions for you, although it may not appear so at first glance. Some parts may resist joy, fearing disappointment or vulnerability. Some parts may believe with joy, comes danger.  By acknowledging and understanding these resistant parts, you can begin to build a compassionate relationship with them. And with this relationship, you can have a better understanding of their intention.

Working with a Part that Resists Joy

Take some time to go through this process when you find yourself resisting joy.  Additionally, this week's meditation practice is a similar guided process.

Find a quiet place to practice where you won’t be disturbed.  Read through the steps first, then close your eyes and go through the steps.  After you are finished, writ down what you learned and what showed up for you during this practice.

  • Step 1 Recognition and Acknowledgment:  Begin by acknowledging the presence of the part within you that is resistant to joy. Recognize that this part has its own valid concerns and intentions and believes it is doing what’s best for you, even if they may be hindering your ability to experience joy. Approach this part with curiosity and openness, without judgment.
  • Step 2 Establishing Connection and Dialogue:  Invite the resistant part to come forward and express itself. Create a safe and non-judgmental space for it to share its concerns and fears about experiencing joy. Listen attentively and empathetically, honoring its voice and perspective.
  • Step 3 Understanding the Part's Intentions:  Seek to understand the positive intentions of the resistant part. It may be trying to protect you from potential disappointment, vulnerability, or other perceived risks. Explore the underlying beliefs and fears that drive its resistance. Validate the part's intentions and express gratitude for its efforts to keep you safe.
  • Step 4 Expressing Appreciation and Reassurance: Offer reassurance to the resistant part that you understand and appreciate its protective role. Let it know that you value its contribution to your well-being. Assure the part that you are committed to finding a way to experience joy that aligns with its concerns and intentions.
  • Step 5 Healing and Integration:  Guide the resistant part towards a deeper understanding of the potential benefits of embracing joy. Help it explore alternative ways to protect and support you that are more aligned with experiencing joy. Facilitate an internal negotiation process to find a balance between the concerns of the resistant part and the desire for joy, seeking a resolution that honors both.
  • Step 6 Nurturing and Transformation:  Support the resistant part in transforming its role and beliefs around joy. Encourage it to release its resistance and embrace a more open and receptive stance toward joy. Offer nurturing and compassion to this part as it undergoes this transformation, recognizing its growth and evolution.

Remember, working with resistance parts in this way requires patience, compassion, and a willingness to listen deeply. By acknowledging, understanding, and integrating the resistant part, you pave the way for a harmonious relationship with joy and create space for its abundant presence in your life.

After working with the resistance, you are in a position to cultivate and allow more joy in your life.  Because this may be something new and unfamiliar, I invite you to take on 7 (or more) days of joy.

The 7-Day Joy Challenge

If you are ready to infuse your life with even more joy, take on this 7-day joy challenge and witness the transformative power of cultivating joy in your daily life. Each day, commit to embracing a new joy-focused action step and observe the ripple effect it creates. 

Take a look at this video as a starting point. And below are some tips for your next 7 days.

  • Gratitude: Start your day by writing down three things you are grateful for. Throughout the day, bring these moments of gratitude to mind and allow them to fill you with joy.
  • Joy Trigger Exploration: Discover a new joy trigger. Engage in an activity or experience that you've always wanted to try or something that brings back fond memories. Allow yourself to fully immerse in the joy it brings.
  • Random Acts of Kindness:  Spread joy to others by performing random acts of kindness. It could be as simple as offering a sincere compliment, helping someone in need, or surprising a loved one with a small gesture of appreciation.
  • Mindful Joy:  Practice mindful joy today. Take a few minutes to savor a pleasurable experience fully. Engage all your senses, whether it's relishing a delicious meal, feeling the warmth of the sun on your skin, or listening to your favorite song.
  • Joyful Movement:  Engage in joyful movement today. It could be dancing, taking a nature walk, or participating in a physical activity that brings you joy. Allow your body to move with freedom and let the joy of movement fill your spirit.
  • Embrace Playfulness:  What did you love to do as a child? Do more of that.  Allow your inner child to come out and play! Embrace a spirit of playfulness and curiosity. Engage in activities that spark joy, whether it's dancing, singing, or pursuing a hobby. Build a sandcastle, fly a kite, play a board game, or indulge in any activity that awakens your sense of wonder and playfulness.  Release self-consciousness and allow yourself to fully immerse in the moment, experiencing the joy that arises from within.
  • Share Joy:  Spread joy to others today. Reach out to a friend or loved one and share a joyful experience or memory. Offer them support, encouragement, or simply a listening ear. Together, you can create a shared space of joy and connection.

Throughout this 7-day joy challenge, remember to reflect on your experiences and journal about the joy you encounter along the way. Notice any shifts in your mindset and overall well-being. Celebrate each moment of joy, however small or significant.

By committing to this joy challenge, you are actively nurturing your relationship with joy and allowing it to become an integral part of your life. Embrace the challenge, and may your days be filled with an abundance of joy!

Remember, the journey toward joy is a lifelong endeavor. Continue cultivating joy beyond this challenge, exploring new ways to infuse joy into your everyday experiences. May joy be your constant companion on this beautiful path of self-discovery and transformation.

Enjoy the 7-day joy challenge, and may it bring you boundless happiness!

BONUS Action Steps for Cultivating Joy

  • Embrace Self-Compassion: Begin your journey by showering yourself with self-compassion. Understand that it is perfectly okay to experience a range of emotions, including sadness or frustration. Embrace your imperfections and release self-judgment. Treat yourself with kindness, understanding, and patience as you navigate the path toward joy.
  • Uncover Limiting Beliefs:  Explore the beliefs and thought patterns that may be blocking your joy. Are there any negative beliefs about yourself or joy itself? Challenge these beliefs by seeking evidence to the contrary. Reframe them with positive, empowering perspectives. Remember, you are deserving of joy, and it is your birthright to experience it.
  • Nurture Self-Care:  Make self-care a priority on your journey to joy. Engage in practices that nourish your mind, body, and spirit. Whether it's practicing mindfulness, taking a soothing bath, or indulging in a creative pursuit, honor your need for self-nurturing. By caring for yourself, you create space for joy to flourish.

"The joy we feel has little to do with the circumstances of our lives and everything to do with the focus of our lives." - Russel M. Nelson

I invite you to embark on this beautiful journey of cultivating joy. Remember, joy is a practice, and it requires your active participation. Embrace self-compassion, challenge limiting beliefs, and nurture self-care. Identify your joy triggers, cultivate gratitude, and embrace playfulness. As you take these valuable action steps, watch as joy unfolds in your life, enriching every facet of your existence.

So, take the first step today. Embrace the belief that you are worthy of joy and allow it to permeate every corner of your being. Let joy be your guiding light, illuminating the path to a life filled with love, meaning, and boundless joy. You deserve it.

May your journey be filled with an abundance of joy!


Sara Raymond